Ya might as well give a kiss on the cheek if you’re going to do this. A bone dry peck with tight, dry, rigid lips is about as unsexy as it gets. You may be overeager to show “what a great tongue” you have, but it is unwise to do that if you can’t do it without making a huge mess. If you move face far to the side, it signifies a kiss on the cheek. This is in the family of the Accidental Kiss, only this smooch is intended. It’s good to be enthusiastic about a kiss, but this one is beyond enthusiastic. This is a preference thing, but some of the things that can make a kiss taste really bad are: cigarettes, onions, garlic, tuna fish, stinky cheese and halitosis.
If a kiss makes a woman’s face wet, something has gone terribly wrong. The guy went to kiss my cheek and I went to give him my cheek and we both went opposite directions and BLAMO! You can avoid this kissing mishap by giving clear spacial signals to your date. It may include biting, forceful shoving of a tongue down the throat, full tonsil exploration, and face eating. The rest of those things, please avoid if you plan to kiss someone for the first time in the next 6-12 hours.
don’t have anything to talk about, but if I’m sitting across from an uncommunicative human for an hour, I will feel compelled to fill up every second of that hour with words. I’m really here to talk about first kiss anxiety, which is way, way more serious. I’m hovering.” I think it’s intended to be romantic in some way, but unless you are MADLY in love with the person and the smell of their breath gets you high, it’s just weird. If you make eye contact and move in dead on, it signifies a kiss on the lips. One or both of the people miscalculates the angle and noses collide or you get a jaw in your eye socket or teeth clack together. It’s as if you just got out of the slammer earlier that day.
And for those of you who similarly fear awkward silences, you know how much energy it takes to fill an entire hour with words. I think there are two schools of thought on first kisses: Those who think a bad first kiss indicates incompatibility and those who believe that kissing is not all-important. If she moves away from your dead on approach, SHE DOESN”T WANT TO KISS. Whatever face parts manage to get in the way, this kiss is never fun. You’re on a mission to kiss a human woman and it doesn’t matter whose mouth gets in your way.
If you’re a member of Team Kissing Is Not All-Important, it’s all-important for me to be up front and tell you that we don’t have anything to talk about. I saw a couple doing this on the street the other night and I had to look away. The Phantom Kiss is when the two lips don’t actually touch. If all this seems too confusing, just go in for the hug and wait until next time to tackle the kiss.
A bad first kiss is enough to put me off the person … So, when I’m on a date, and we have stuff to talk about, I am then free to live in fearful anticipation of that first lip lock. It’s the “I’m just going to hover millimeters away from your mouth inhaling your breath” move.
After the jump, some kinds of first kisses that will render romance DOA.
Don't be crude."It sounds simple and unnecessary to say, but you would be shocked at how many guys don't realize this. Something you think isn't even crude, she could find repulsive," says JR Gudger, bartender at New York City's popular beer-soaked bro-country nirvana Brother Jimmy's and member of The Barnstorm.3. If you’re going to pick up a girl in a bar, always have cash ready.
"Bribes generally aren't good openers," says Steve Yorsz of Rochelle’s in New York City.2.
If you want to follow up with a guy, just f*ck the old school rules. If you want someone who is more responsive, and who takes the initiative to text you more often, don't bother. Texting can easily become a crazy game of misread signals and unclear vibes. If you want to hang out with him again, and sending a double text is no sweat off of your back, go for it. If it's been a month or two, and his lack of replies is becoming a pattern, double text with confidence and figure out exactly what his agenda is.
With more and more dating sites and limited opportunities to meet someone on-the-go, the whole situation can feel a little overwhelming, even exhausting.